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Monday, March 13, 2006

Jack Thompson Threatens Wikipedia

Not just Wikipedia, it seems ... but anyone who edited his page. Apparently Jack didn't like what was said about him at Wikipedia so he started to change it. Nobody can seem to find a transcript of his changes, but Cathode Tan scientists used prediction models to determine it probably said "I am the hand of God to smack down stooopid gamers!!!!" ... fifty times in a row. The Wikipedians didn't like that, so they started editing it back ... and Jack threatened to sue them all unless things went his way.

It's amazing, how everything BatJack turns into the logical equivalent of debating with a three year old. Currently the Wikipedians have taken the page down to sort everything out. Cathode Tan Labs predict it will go thusly: 1) Wikipedia does an extensive fact check 2) Wikipedia replaces Jack's page with one more or less like it was before and 3) Jack remembers he never actually wins a case that goes to trial ... takes ball home.

The wiki discussion on the whole thing is a hoot, though with gems like:

Why is someone deleting my update re: GTA lawsuit?"It is widely believed that the most refereshing activity on the planet is kicking Jack Thompson in the balls." Amusing... but no. Removed. --GarageBay9 09:13 July 26


Classic.


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6 comments:

Thomas said...

You know, as a DC-area resident, I take exception to his Beltway Sniper "prediction."

The real culprit in that case was not video games. I don't even remember anyone seriously bringing up the video game angle. It was bad parenting--the kid's father took him out to shoot some people, if I remember correctly. They were crazed religious fanatics.

But hey: that's family values for ya.

Thomas said...

Now that I think about it, someone should really start a parody batjack.blogspot.com, and see if he'll go after Google.

Josh said...

Thanks, Mike, for hunting that down. Pure gold. Accurately predicted he would be a video game addict? Bah. Anyone who plays any game is an addict to BatJack.

In Jack's worlds, gamer's brains are all fried from playing games all day and certainly can't remember when he got kicked off the Devin Moore case or how his Columbine statements are continually false.

Oh wait, guess we can.

My favorite though:

Only "officially certified sane" lawyer by The Florida Bar

Wait. That can really only mean two things:

1) Jack was certified insane and then later certified sane.

2) Jack's behavior was so insane that the Florida Bar felt it necessary to hire a shrink to see if he was certifiable.

And Jack, being so confused, takes it as a good thing.

Josh said...

Just found it. Apparently during his 2 Live Crew Crusade, the Florida Supreme Court ordered him to undergo a psych evaluation fearing he had a disabling obsession with pornography.

Which is a shame, because if they had just looked for a paranoid schizophrenic ... they might have found one.

Thomas said...

Oh, that's funny. I remember reading about the 2 Live Crew episode in a rock crit collection a while back, but it didn't mention that Jack was the lawyer.

He's got a real history of being an asshole, doesn't he? Any day now we're going to find out that he shot JFK.

Josh said...

If he did, he'd probably blame pinball machines or those airgun carnie stands for making him do it.